How to Lead a Team That Doesn’t Like You (Yet)

Stepping into a leadership role where the team isn’t sold on you is like walking into a room with the temperature set to freezing. You feel the chill immediately. The silence. The side glances. The sense that you’re an outsider.

I’ve been there. And it’s one of the toughest positions to lead from. But it’s also one of the most valuable. Because when you walk into a room where trust doesn’t exist yet, you’re forced to build it from scratch.

When a team doesn’t know you, they don’t owe you anything. Your title doesn’t matter. Your resume doesn’t matter. What matters is what you do from that first moment on.

I’ve learned that the worst thing you can do is try to win them over by being overly authoritative or overly friendly. Neither works. Instead, show up and do the work. Ask questions without assuming you know the answers. Seek to understand their world before expecting them to understand yours.

Transparency is your greatest asset. Be honest about your intentions. Share why you’re there and what you hope to achieve. Let them see that you’re not there to control but you’re there to learn, to connect, to align.

Show consistency. Keep your word. Be the same person every day. The more they see that you’re reliable, the more they’ll start to believe in you. And don’t be afraid to admit what you don’t know. People respect leaders who are real, not those who pretend to have all the answers.

Building trust in a skeptical room takes time. It’s not about charming them. It’s about showing them, through your actions, that you’re there for the right reasons.

And one day, that room that felt so cold? It starts to warm up. Not because you demanded it. But because you earned it.